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Fisher: In Soviet Russia, television watches you. Raccoon: In Trump's America, microwaves turn into cameras. Fisher: Trump's claim that Obama spied on him can mean only one of two things. Raccoon: Either the N.S.A. had enough evidence of wrongdoing for a FISA warrant, or Trump is bugfuck crazy. Fisher: There is a third possibility: Obama's N.S.A. spied on Trump the same way they spied on Angela Merkel, Francois Hollande, Ehud Olmert... Raccoon: Dude, those allegations were totally memory-holed.

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Trump accused (via Tweet, of course, because that's the proper channel) Obama of (I guess personally) going so low as to "tapp" his phones during the "very sacred election" the fucking GOP fucking stole for him. There are all kinds of problems with this, up to and including that using the power of the office of the President to falsely accuse people is an impeachable offense. We can add it to the list, not that it matters.

Since Trump bleated out that insanity Spicey tried to walk it back and talking skullstick Kellyanne Conway said, in one of her bizarre pronouncements which are becoming her trademark, that there exist "microwaves that turn into cameras", which, yeah, sure, I bet they do, just like Bumblebee turns into a fucking GM product placement, hopefully with that same "wank-wank-wank" sound effect.

The only problem with the insanity here is that there's no reason to imagine Obama's NSA didn't tap[p] Trump's phones because, well, first they're tapping everyone's phones, didn't we get mad about that just a few years ago, and also, it's not as if they don't have a history of deploying surveillance against putative allies.

On the other hand Americans apparently have the memory span of mayflies with dementia so never mind.