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Sheep: The Trump regime is bringing back the Presidential Fitness Test. Goat: Fascist authoritarians are often obsessed with displays of physical health. Sheep: It's ironic because Trump is in no way fit. He is, in fact, colossally, manifestly, comically unfit. He's the least fit person imaginable. Goat: As in all things, the rhetoric of fascism is unrelated to the reality. Sheep: I'm saying Trump isn't fit to be President and also isn't physically fit. Goat: Yes, thanks, I got it.

NEW COMIC TWO OR THREE TIMES A WEEK, OR WHEN THE MOOD STRIKES

Personally I always associate the Presidental Fitness Test with peanuts because I was in grade school when Jimmy Carter was president and we started trying to meet the standard. That was hilarious.

Trump announced the resumption of this program (which I guess isn't a waste of money like cancer research and PBS) with, among others, former football player and registered sex offender Lawrence Taylor. I looked up what Taylor did and found this gem: "A 16-year-old girl said she was beaten and forced to go to Taylor’s hotel room to have sex with him. Taylor said at the time he was unaware that the girl was underage, and that he thought she was 19." So what Taylor is saying here is, yeah, I beat and raped that woman, but I thought she was older. Wrestler Triple H was there, too, because I guess now that Hulk Hogan's dead we need a new giant wrestling asshole. [Side note: I think Motorhead should sue. Lemmy was his own kind of asshole but I'm pretty sure he'd do nothing but mock Trump given the chance.]