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Hippo: Tom Suozzi, typical asshole Long Islander, writes in the New York Times: "Only by working together to find compromise on parts of Mr. Trump's agenda can we make progress for Americans who are clearly demanding change in the economy, immigration, crime and other top issues." Hippo: This Tom Buchanan East Egg motherfucker telling Dems to compromise with the Trump administration. Let's compromise on whether trans people deserve human rights. Let's compromise on how little we should fund education. Let's compromise and only ban some books. Let's only deport most brown people. Let's arm Israel but tell them to genocide only some of the Palestinians. Hippo: Let's not be the Party of "No, But" -- when fascism calls, let's say "Yes, And!" Hippo: Happy New Year, fuckwits.

NEW COMIC MONDAYS, WEDNESDAYS, AND FRIDAYS AND WHEN THE MOOD STRIKES

Catch this asswipe right out of Gatsby, the Great: Tom Suozzi, a stereotypical dipshit accountant and lawyer from Long Island and now replacement for George Santos, wrote this incredibly brain-damaged and drooling op-ed in the New York Times. "Let's try something different" he says, like Chuck Schumer and the rest of the Democrats in the House and Senate haven't been bending over backward to compromise absolutely every shred of morals or scruples they ever had in an attempt to pass anything, however benighted, past the useless caucus of Republicans and two absolute shit-for-brains Democrats named Sinema and Manchin. How many more rounds of this are we going to have to go through before these brickheads understand that a) Republicans don't join Democrats, they just move even farther right and b) THE AMERICAN PEOPLE DON'T WANT THAT, the American people want lots of progressive shit that no one is offering.